He was an ordinary footballer, a rotten pundit and has bad hair. But surely, assasination is a bit harsh?
Indeed it would be, but it’s the horrible little scrote pictured left, who needs to get the chop, rather than the insufficiently coiffured ex-footballer. Actor Jack P Shepherd, who plays David Platt in Coronation Street, may well be a nice lad in real life, but the character he plays is seriously loathsome and possesses the most irritating face on TV, topped off with a blow-dried ferret hairstyle (it’s funny how the hair thing keeps cropping up.)
No doubt the social worker types will attempt to explain his behaviour by pointing to an unfortunate upbringing but that doesn’t wash. Is he the only youngster whose mother has re-married to a serial murderer and been driven into a canal along with the rest of his family? Clearly not.
The script writers missed a golden opportunity to dispose of the young Platt a few months ago when they allowed dopey Maria to interrupt Charlie Stubbs’s creditable attempt to drown him in the bath. Bad move, but then the scribes of Weatherfield seem to have lost the plot recently, if you’ll pardon the expression.
Coronation Street’s never been known for its fast moving story lines. If you’re off on holiday, there’s no need to set the video recorder, because the chances of something happening are more or less zero. The problem now, is that a basic premise of drama is being ignored: There needs to be a good guy and a bad guy.
Take the recent spat between Tracy Barlow (baddie) and Charlie (baddie). It doesn’t work, although the scene where she bludgeons her lover to death with a household ornament, after a cringeworthy attempt at lap dancing, was worth watching for its unintended hilarity. Now we have David (baddie) versus Tracy (still a baddie). Nope, that doesn’t do it either.
Wee Platt is currently trying to get his leg over with the batty Barlow in return for perjuring himself in court on her behalf. This seems unwise, as it’s likely to be coitus interruptus courtesy of a sharp implement. Of course, if his story unravels in court then he might be spared. In these circumstances News Hog might allow him to live, but only providing he gets a long enough sentence to keep him off screen for a decade or so. Any chance that transportation could be reinstated?
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